The Locked Gate

Yesterday I did a reading for myself and the card I puzzled over the most was #51, which I think of as "The Locked Gate." I wasn't sure exactly how it fit into my reading. I usually think of this card as one of "not being ready," or "closed opportunities." But it didn't seem to match what the other cards said.

My question was "Will it be beneficial for me to take a Memoir Writing class that starts next week?" One of my goals for 2016 is to write more, and taking writing classes helps me to keep up the practice. Yet some small part of me hesitated to sign up. I wondered if it was because I needed to have some space to myself at the beginning of the new year before filling my schedule with too many activities. Here is the full spread (click on the picture to get a larger view):

I wasn't quite sure what the "Past" card meant, but I interpreted it as "trust." In the past, I have taken other writing classes with playwright and teacher Douglas Jones at The Visual Arts Center of Richmond (click here to find writing classes that VisArts offers). He always sets a mood of trust and openness among his students. I started with "The Creative Spark" and finally felt brave enough to take "Writing the Shadow" in 2014. The Shadow class opened me up to looking at the darker side of myself - the parts I'm afraid to share or that I hide away. I didn't write about everything that scared me, but it helped me to understand and integrate that side of myself a little more, and to recognize the value of looking at and using the shadow in my writing, art, and life.

The "Present" card showed an open gate leading into a peaceful-looking park. I took that to mean openness and being ready to take the class. The "Challenge or Goal" was hands releasing dust (at least, that is what it looked like to me.) Perhaps this meant letting go - of control? Maybe stepping into the class not quite knowing what I will write or how it will come out? The Memoir course description said it would help writers to explore a focused part of their life, and I wasn't sure which part I would want to write about.

My "Internal" and "External Influences" were funny because they mirrored each other. In my inner world, I saw the process of writing memoir as a series of humongous mountains. In the external world, it showed a snake climbing over a small hill. This is so me. I always see projects as being huge and daunting, when in actuality they can only be carried out through a process of small steps, much like the snake going over the hill.

The "Release" card showed a guy sailing the seas on the back of a whale. I think of this card as one of adventure and searching. But because it was in the release position, I thought it meant I shouldn't go looking around everywhere or feel like I have to reach far, that maybe the stories I need to write are closer to me than I think. My "Accept" card showed the locked gate, which I'll get back to in a moment. My "Possibilities" cards showed a hand writing and sprouting lots of new ideas, and also a hand holding a key to a locked box which seemed to mean unlocking my writing spirit. So why the locked gate? That seemed contradictory to those two cards. I think there was a clue in my "Direction" card. It showed a hand with a cut on it - my writing might reveal some pain or make me feel vulnerable.

I pondered the locked gate. I even looked up the interpretations in the handbook that I myself wrote! It said: "Restrictions, not being ready, opportunity is unavailable, being denied - 'having the door closed in your face.'" 

Hmm.

Everything else in the reading seemed to point to the fact that taking the Memoir class would be a beneficial experience that would open up my writing self. So why did I have to accept this locked gate? 

This morning I woke up and understood. I also had clarity on other parts of the reading. I think the gate does mean something restricted. I think it's the part of myself I had restricted to others, the part that I am ashamed to show anyone but those closest to me who won't push me away. It's my anger. Most people are surprised to learn that I have an angry side. It's something I've wanted to write about but wasn't sure how to share. I think the card is telling me that it's time to accept this locked-up part of myself. It's time to write about it and own it, and thereby release it (I hope). 

Last month I was talking to a friend about fairy tales and horror movies. I told him how sometimes I want to watch horror movies but they scare me so much I can't go to sleep and they make me feel like the world is a horrible place.* My friend, who loves horror movies, said "The world can be a horrible place." I told him that even though fairy tales could also be horrific, I have been drawn to them since I was a kid. I said, "There's something about fairy tales that's not as bad as horror movies. Maybe because in the end there is comfort." I realized that fairy tales would not have the impact they do without that fear and the subsequent promise of comfort. The fear is an important element of the story. In fact, it is crucial. I told him I wanted to integrate more of my darker self into my art and writing, even in my work for children. He said he wanted to integrate more of the lighter side of himself into his already dark art and writing. 

Going back to the reading, I looked at the "Past," "Challenge," and "Direction" cards again and saw that they they have further dimension by alluding to a specific period of my life when my anger was uncontrollable, when I thought it might destroy myself and a relationship that I had. Looking back, that experience was a gift because it revealed the worst part of myself, and showed that I can still be loved and loving in spite of it. That part of me will never go away because it is me, though just an aspect. Just like my "good" side is just another aspect of myself. 

Now I'm not sure if I will ever share those experiences with anyone but my writing class and a few loved ones, and if I'm brave enough to write about it at all whether I will choose to share it out loud. But the cards don't lie about what is needed in my life.

I signed up for the writing class.

* If you're looking for a really good "horror" movie, watch "The Babadook." I'd heard it was extremely scary but extremely good, and I waffled over watching it for a month. When I finally did watch it, I was not scared. I was actually moved enough to shed tears. It was the first time I saw my own dark side externalized (though of course exaggerated in the movie). I empathized with both the protagonist and the monster, seeing it as a metaphor for the horror within. My boyfriend totally didn't get the metaphor, though, so I had to explain it to him.

Trust in a Smile

I don't usually pull cards for myself. I used to quite often, but I found that in the past I relied too heavily on the cards and not enough on my self. The cards are a tool to access the self, but it can turn unhealthy when they start replacing trust in your own feelings and judgement. On the rare occasion when I have wanted a reading, I like to go to another reader for advice who can be more objective than I can be.

But I've had the nagging feeling that I should pull some cards and see what comes up, and today I did. My reading was done on my art desk, and you can see some evidence of art-making in progress. I've been doing a lot of wondering and analyzing in the past couple months about this almost constant anxiety I have in my day-to-day life. One of the greatest sources of anxiety at the moment is my solo art show coming up in June. I don't have much time to create new artwork, yet not only am I trying to create all new pieces for the show, I'm also using a medium which is a bit more unfamiliar to me - printmaking on fabric. The processes alone are time consuming, and I've already spent a couple months just doing research about techniques and styles of fiber art - quilting in particular. It has been really fun to learn about and work in a new medium, but also daunting. I am also working part-time and teaching. I know many people who have schedules far more demanding than mine, but I am perpetually anxious about whether I can do it all. I have always preferred a more slow, relaxed pace to life but the demands of earning a somewhat stable income while also creating artwork make that difficult. I had the last couple of days off from work and thought I'd get a lot done, but I had a lot of trouble focusing due to the pressure I put on myself as well as feeling not quite sure about which step to take next in my art process.

I asked the cards for advice about how to manage all my duties and my life leading up to the art show.



The first card represents "The Past," and shows a bell ringing out. I took that to signify my feelings of alarm, a bell call letting me know that I needed to start focusing on my art show. It may also symbolize the need for communication through my art - this is my time to sing out and express myself. The second card represents "The Present," and shows a flower growing out of the flames. I think this card means that I am going through a "trial by fire" in terms of managing my workload and creative processes. I think it's a time when I am being tested, or testing myself, to show that I can emerge from this period of intensity shining brightly and transformed by the flames. I've always thought of this as the "alchemy" card. The next card, #17, represents my "Challenge or Goal." Again, this is an image of great intensity showing a lightening bolt striking open an egg. I feel this shows outside forces (the art show, my teaching and work duties) coming in and cracking me open like an eggshell. While this split is sudden and forceful, perhaps it is telling me that it's time to get out of my shell right now, to accept all that is going on. Underneath that card is #37 showing my "Internal Influence" - my feelings. I feel like that traveller, staring up at vast mountains and wondering how I'm going to cross. I guess a more positive view of this is that I am an adventurer about to scale mountains. Maybe it's daunting, but at the same time exciting. At the top of this column is the card representing my "External Influence." It shows a figure under a bridge with two faces. When I created this card, I always thought of this figure as the god Janus. From Wikipedia:

In ancient Roman religion and myth, Janus (Latin: IANVS) is the god of beginnings and transitions,^[1] thence also of gates, doors, passages, endings and time. He is usually depicted as having two faces, since he looks to the future and to the past. The Romans named the month of January (Ianuarius) in his honor.

At first glance, I thought this card showed an element of busy-ness. The figure seemed to be looking back and forth rapidly, constantly switching from one thing to another (for me - my various obligations, as well as the switch from research to concepts to actual art-making.) But I think this card also represents the theme of my art show. I am creating works based on a specific time and place, a small town in Northern New Mexico that I visited five years ago. It was an experience very close to my heart, and something I've struggled to adequately express through words and images ever since. I think the card shows that this show is important to me because it is a way for me to look back at the past, ahead to my future (I'm hoping to continue this series of images and use the images to apply for arts grants) as well as the bridging of the two. This is something I've thought consciously about as I create the work, how I'm using new processes that I would not have used 5 years ago, and how my thoughts and experiences since that time have influenced how I look at those memories now.

Moving on to the advice cards, the "Release" card shows a figure holding the sun, moon, and stars in one hand. I think this card has to do with control. I need to release the need to control my universe. I need to let things flow as they will. The card above it is the "Accept" card and shows a snake slithering over a hill. I think this card is telling me to get over that hump, to just proceed steadily and keep low to the earth. I think that at times I get lost in thought and speculation, and I really just need to keep working and not worry so much. I think this card is also poking fun at my "Internal Influence" card that showed vast mountains. Perhaps I'm making mountains out of molehills at times, and need to just keep a steady pace and stick to what's in front of me- one step, or slither, at a time. Card #34 shows a house on fire. I was not scared of that card. It signified my "Possible Outcome" and I thought of it as a card of purification, of "cleaning house." It seems significant that I have so many cards with the element of fire in them - the flower in the flame, the lightening bolt, and now this burning house. It made me remember that for me, the artwork I'm creating is very personal and getting it in the open is a form of catharsis for me. Maybe this means I will experience intense emotions, perhaps intensified anxiety, but I think in the end it is all for the best. Card #47 shows "Further Possibilities" and it confirms my feelings that the process I'm going through now is a way to bring my memories full circle, as much as memories can come full circle. The plants in this card go through a cycle of death and rebirth. There's more to the story of what these memories mean to me, but I'd like to keep some of it private. But I will say that these memories are a joyful beginning to a road that also led through much pain, and I think that the celebration of these memories will help me to release that pain.

The last two cards in the upper right are the "Theme" cards for my reading. Card #36 flipped out of my deck while shuffling so I set it aside. It shows a boy with a sack, travelling light-heartedly. Card #15 shows a woman smiling. I think that both of these cards show that I need to relax and enjoy the process, that everything will work out and be okay. I can get so caught up in worrying and planning for the future. Every so often I will experience a moment where there is this incredible emptiness in my brain. It happens so rarely that it is immediately noticeable. This emptiness is saying "Nothing is wrong. There is nothing to worry about right now." That sounds kind of crazy, but I have an almost constant low-level anxiety that fills my thoughts and makes me worry about what I have to worry about next! I've been observing these thought processes, and I realize that it's not about what actually pops up in my life. It's about my state of mind. I know I need to find a way to relax and feel okay with life, but it is very hard for me to do. I've been like this for as long as I can remember. Maybe I should carry around the card with the smiling woman. Her face is very reassuring. Every time I panic that I don't have the energy or capacity to do what I need to, I need to pull the card out, take a deep breath, and trust in her smile.

From "The Daily Draw"

Hi everyone!

I wanted to let you in on another blogger who has posted some well-wrought insights on a couple of the Golden Moth cards. Her name is Tierney Sadler, and she posts almost every day on "The Daily Draw" blog, pulling from her vast and varied collection of tarot decks. Llewellyn is publishing her Tarot Toolkit called "The Deck of 1000 Spreads" in March! Check it out. Even if you are not a tarot-enthusiast, her posts are insightful enough to get anyone thinking about life and the choices we all make.

You can read her Golden Moth interpretations here:

Card #17- What do you see in this card? Does your interpretation relate to something in your own life right now? What message does it hold for you?

Card #58 - What value and import do you place on community? How much do you give to your community? Do you feel there's room in your life to kick it up a notch?

What I love about Tierney's readings is her ability to cut through to the heart of a matter in a sometimes brutally honest way. She also provides historical background information about the cards - something I've never had much patience to do, which is why I created my own card deck in an intuitive way rather than spending a long time on research. So be sure to check out her blog for her individual spin on the cards!

I hope everyone is enjoying their holidays. For me, it is a time of stress as well as joy, so I'm now making a very pleasant effort to rest and relax. That means reading lots of books, watching television, and not leaving the house much. Ah, such a nice break. In my head, I am also working on a review of the year which I plan to post soon. I wish everyone the ability to enjoy some peace and fun whenever you can!

The Man in the Moon

About a month ago, friend, illustrator, and Golden Moth Deck owner Katie Green asked me to write about Card #21, or what I consider "The Moon" card. Forgive me if this post gets a bit rambly, because it has been on my mind for awhile now. It is also serendipitous because when I checked out Priscilla Smith's blog Spirit Speak 444, I discovered that she had pulled this card today! Priscilla is pulling one card everyday this November and writing about it. You can read her Moon/Star post here. It has been interesting to read Priscilla's interpretations of the cards because it further reinforces my decision to keep the symbols simple and in a single color (which was also suggested by Katie Green - double thanks!) I think these artistic decisions make the interpretation of each symbol much more open and free-flowing. With simple line drawings and no color cues, people are able to see what comes to their unique minds without too much outside influence. Priscilla's posts have also shown me that how someone literally sees an image is so very personal, based on their history and personality. It all continues to fascinate me, as both an artist and the creator of this deck. When Priscilla first mentioned this card in her Golden Moth Deck Interview, she called it "The Man from the Moon." Upon seeing this, I realized that when turned upside down, the object in the center of the image does look kind of like a person! Crazy, I did not picture this when I was drawing it. Actually, I meant the object to look a bit like a castle or a weird plant. I left it purposely ambiguous. The image actually came to me many years before as I was doodling some designs for T-shirts and this strange castle-ish image came out onto the page. I certainly didn't think I would end up turning it into a divination card.

When I created this symbol, I was highly inspired by the Moon card of the traditional Rider-Waite tarot deck and the interpretation I found on www.learntarot.com. 

The Moon card is often seen as representing fears, anxieties, heightened fantasies and imagination, intuition, and creativity. I thought of this card as a ghostly imagination-castle growing out of a lake reflecting stars. However, the reflections are not total mirror images, which makes them a little less cut-and-dry. In fact, for a long time this card still remained ambiguous, artistically and interpretation-wise. I had some idea of what it meant through studying the Moon card in tarot tradition, but it still eluded me a bit when it came up in readings. Now I can see the symbol of an upside-down Man in the Moon is very fitting for this card as well. It reminds me of the Hanged Man card in the tarot tradition.The Hanged Man is one of those paradoxical cards. While the words "Hanged Man" can sound ominous, the man in the card is very calm and the ring of light around his head makes him seem as though he is enlightened in the spiritual sense. (And isn't it further serendipity that my Moon card is #21, and the tarot Hanged Man card is that number reversed - #12? Woo...believe me, I didn't do that on purpose.) From learntarot.com:  

"The main lesson of the Hanged Man is that we "control" by letting go - we "win" by surrendering. The figure on Card 12 has made the ultimate surrender - to die on the cross of his own travails - yet he shines with the glory of divine understanding. He has sacrificed himself, but he emerges the victor. The Hanged Man also tells us that we can "move forward" by standing still. By suspending time, we can have all the time in the world."

I see the influence of this paradoxical and mystical energy in my Moon card. In readings for others and for myself, the Moon card will often come up during times of uncertainty. But I also think it is about trusting the moment and allowing unknowing to function in your life. The moon appears when the clear light of day is absent and we are left with a different kind of light - bright in its own way, but softer, more mysterious and magical. I think that this card often appears in times of life when events, thoughts, or actions have this sort of mysterious quality. Perhaps we are building a castle out of moonlight, letting the castle grow out of the water like a strange plant with its own life-force. Maybe we are simply dreaming, letting ourselves float through the night because we know the dream won't last. Or maybe we are dreaming so that we can figure out how to build the dream during waking life. The light of the moon is our testing ground, a time when we can create, drift, imagine, explore what we don't know. This all sounds pretty ambiguous and mystical, I know. But I do believe that is what the Moon card is about, at least to me. A time of transitions, a time to see our world in a different light. What does the Moon mean to you?

This card also has personal significance for me because I believe it is my guiding force when doing readings for other people. Since self-publishing the deck, I have done many more readings and I think that I have grown as a reader because of it. There have been many instances when people have told me they felt better after a reading, and I could feel it from their smiles and the lightness in their demeanor. But there are times when I feel nervous or unsure of what others are getting from the readings. Sometimes I go into anxiety-mode and start talking much more than is necessary, trying to fill the nervous space by leaving no stone unturned. I've come to realize that reading cards is very much about being in the moment, responding to people's needs as well as knowing what it is in my power to offer them. I can't always tell people what they want to hear. As much as I want to help people who are going through difficult situations, I have decided that my role as a reader is one of facilitator for people to understand themselves better. I try to remind people that they do know themselves and what they need to do, the cards are just there to help them see it in a more conscious way. I am not an all-knower, all-fixer, or there to placate them just so I feel good about myself. I don't think anyone really expects that of me, but it is tempting to wish that I could make people's lives better through my readings.

I am constantly floored by the mystery of life. Who is to say what effect - subtle or larger - that the readings will have on a person? Maybe I helped someone become more conscious of a negative pattern. Maybe talking through a reading helped lightened a burden for someone. Maybe the burden will come back, maybe it won't. I can't know or control it all. All I can do is try my best to be open to what is needed in the moment. Whenever I shuffle the cards, I've come to ask in my head "What does so-&-so need to hear right now? What does he/she need?" which amusingly makes me think about the Oracle in The Matrix movies. And it is amazing when I allow myself to be open to the cards and see them fresh each time. I definitely have personal interpretations for each card, but lately I've been trying to truly be in the moment and trust my intuition. It actually makes a card look different each time. Certain aspects will appear more strongly to me. I also am more open to other people's interpretations. When I am unsure of a card's meaning in the spread, I will ask the Querent what they think. And this is always the "right" meaning for their situation. I have learned so much more about my cards and their possibilities through the thoughts and suggestions of other people.

Whenever you feel confused or unsure, remember the Moon. Don't try to understand right away. Let it be. Let it be scary, let it be crazy, let it be the wrong thing for you. Or the right thing. Maybe they are the same thing. Let it ramble just as much as this post about the Moon. It is your nightmare, your dream, your mysterious and sacred life.

Shedding Masks and Seeing New Faces

There is a definite chill in the air these days. It's still t-shirt weather for me here in Richmond, VA, but more often than not I will wear a light hoodie while I wait for the clear afternoon sunlight to warm my skin.

I love this kind of weather. I love watching the transition into fall, anticipating the day when I will bundle inside layers of clothing, coats, scarves, and hats that make me feel protected and cocooned against the cold. Being an artist, it feels only natural to sit at my desk and work during these days. While I do want to soak up the perfect autumn days, there isn't the same pull that summertime has with its restless energy.

As we pass the autumnal equinox, the daylight recedes earlier each evening and humans follow the habits of the sun. Our thoughts and inner wanderings become more pronounced as we recede inside of ourselves. I think of October which is coming soon, and the holiday that is the hallmark of the month - Halloween. The modern-day celebration for masked tricksters and glowing pumpkin faces began long ago as a Celtic pagan tradition called Samhain. It was the Celtic New Year, a time to celebrate the gathering of the harvest, honor relatives who had passed, and look towards what the seasons ahead would bring. It was a time of magic, of transitions, when the skin that separated the living and those who passed was very thin.

It is wonderful to feel at peace with transition, with the unveiling of things hidden.

A couple of weeks ago I gave readings at the Blue Elephant (which I'm excited to say will now be a monthly event!) Often when I give readings to many people in a short amount of time, a handful of the same cards will come up again and again - in the same or different positions - within the spread. This is after shuffling, cutting, and having the Querents randomly pick out individual cards that are spread out on the table, so it's not just a matter of the same cards clumping together within the deck. I'm not sure why this happens. Perhaps people intuitively pick up on the energy of cards that have been recently touched. One friend suggested that maybe people go through similar life-themes during certain periods of time, like a cosmic effect. Either way, seeing the same cards over and over again can be disconcerting at times because it's like repetitive deja vu. But it teaches me to be flexible with my interpretations and often alerts me to dimensions of the card that I hadn't noticed before. It's funny to me, and rather amazing, that even though I created these symbols and had specific ideas about their meanings, the cards continue to morph and reveal layers of complexity. These seemingly simple images are so open and inviting if you allow them to be.

One of the cards that came up repeatedly that day is #14. While I advise that no card is inherently positive or negative, I can't help associating this card with unhappiness - which to me is a negative characteristic. However, through the readings I discovered qualities I had not previously recognized, such as judgement, criticalness, and discernment. In themselves, these qualities can be used for beneficial or hindering effects, depending on what the Querent needs in their life. One Querent pointed out to me that #14 is male and the left side of his face is frowning, while #15 is female and her right side if smiling. Not to get too gender-stereotypical, but traditionally males are associated with more analytical, left-brained thinking and women with more intuitive, right-brained thinking. (Although if you want to get really technical, I believe the right and left hemispheres of the brain control the respective opposite sides of the body...) I hadn't thought of these things consciously, but the symbolism had come through intuitively while I was drawing the symbols.

Oh, how I love it when things turn out to be more than they appear.

Dialogue:
Can you think of a time when things turned out to be different than you had previously thought? Do you notice transitions in yourself or others more clearly during certain seasons? 

For those of you who use the Golden Moth Illumination Deck, which cards have come up repeatedly in your readings? Which cards' meanings have revealed multiple dimensions to you over time?

All Eyes on Me

One way that people can become better acquainted with their cards and interpreting the symbols is to do a "Daily Drawing" - choosing one card to meditate on for that particular day. I'd seen it suggested before in Tarot workbooks and blogs, and I was reminded of it again when I read a comment from a reader on my Giveaway blog post and I saw that she devoted her blog to daily readings of cards.

I've never done it before, so I shuffled the cards and pulled this one at random from the deck:

My personal interpretation of this card is that it is one of "playing a new role." Generally in readings for other people, I see this card come up when someone has had a change of circumstance (be it a conscious decision or thrust upon them) and must take on new responsibilities or display aspects of themselves that they aren't used to - for example, they have made a change in their career or they are no longer in a certain relationship that defined them and they now see different meaning in themselves and to the people around them.

I always think of the woman in the card as reaching for a garment or costume, something to clothe her in an outward facade that matches what she feels (or wants to feel) on the inside. Something struck me about this card today - her nakedness. That might seem obvious, but I'd never considered it in quite this way before - keep reading...

I've been teaching art workshops to kids all summer. While I've had some very focused and creative kids in my classes, I've also had some rambunctious ones that have been the cause of some very draining moments. I'm very sensitive to noise, and last week I started to develop a low-grade headache during class because of children that wouldn't stop talking or playing around when I tried to call them to attention. Yesterday, I had a sinking feeling that my new round of 6 - 8 year-olds was going to be even harder to handle than the last. I still don't feel totally comfortable being an authoritative figure. When I first started teaching children three years ago, I hated telling kids, "No" or "Stop that." I do it freely now. But there are still times when kids ask me questions and there is a grey area in the answer. I ask myself, what would an "adult" say in this situation? Or times when I don't know exactly how to react to what a child does or says. How do I teach wrong from right when there are so many larger issues at play? Teaching has taught me many things, and one is that I must be fully present and responsive, or I can let an opportunity pass and be unchallenged. I can now understand why teachers get lazy and pretend not to see what is going on. It takes so much responsibility to absorb and react to every single moment.

I thought about what Card #29 had to teach me about my present situation. When someone goes through a shift and has to play a role that is new or uncomfortable to them, they experience a moment of transition where they must strip themselves of former notions and reach for the garment that will clothe them in the confidence required to "play their part." Within that transition is a moment of nudity - of utter starkness and vulnerability. As humans, we go through these kinds of shifts everyday. In the very practiced, that shift may be imperceptible. In others, it may be empowering as they choose to see and present themselves in a new light. And in others, the shift may seem clunky and even embarrassing. It can be painful to watch others' uncertainty. We don't always have to be comfortable with the roles we play. But if it's important enough to us, we need to at least give it a try - even if that means merely pretending until we feel that we can embody the part.

This morning before I set off to my class, I thought about the freshness of such shifting roles. That I can choose play the role of "Teacher" and take it off more easily than I used to when I first began teaching. That within that role there is a multitude of variables and factors in every moment - in myself, in my students, in our relationship to each other. It reminded me that each day is new and full of possibilities, and that I don't have to weigh myself down with my own expectations. I can allow that nakedness to clear the slate.

Today during class, my kids seemed more focused. I still had a little trouble getting them to listen to directions, but I got a tip from one of them. While helping Logan glue bits of "grass" - green paper paper that he had fringed on the edges - onto his pop-up card, he gave me a tip: "You should say '1-2-3, eyes on me!' the way our other teacher does. Then all the students will look straight into your eyes like this," and he proceeded to give me a wide-eyed, mesmerized stare. I agreed that I would try it out.

When I next needed the class's attention, I called out "1-2-3, eyes on me!" I got about half of the kids to look up at me quietly, which was more than normal. I looked over at Logan. He beamed and nodded his head at me. I guess I'd done something right.

Dialogue:
What does Card #29 mean to you? Were/Are you in a situation where you had to take on a new role? How did that feel? What role do you fear? What role do you desire? What role liberates you?